The Right Way To Get People Saying “Yes” To You More Often – 7 Shortcuts of Influence
If your persuasion skills are not as good as you hoped they should be and you are not getting what you want in life, it is really not your fault and I understand your frustration. I was once in your position. You have been misled and mostly taught the wrong ways to persuade by the confusing advice out there.
Are you fed up with everyone saying “No” to you all the time?
No surprise if our approach has been to ask directly, provide good reasons but still do not get our way. This is the biggest falsehood we’ve been taught. Most places that teach influencing still focus on improving your presentation style and how to put you best foot forward. All this is fake and the right way to persuade is finally available to us. We can relax.
The key is to make people want to say “Yes” to you before even making your request.
Dr. Robert Cialdini’s 7 shortcuts show the right way to do this in his bestselling book, Influence.
This book will truly transform your life and is a must-read if you want to finally understand how to persuade people and get your way.
Here are Cialdini’s main pathways to influencing people:
Reciprocity: Give something to the other person first. Make it personalized and meaningful.
Scarcity: Show limited supply of what you have to offer. People put more value on dwindling resources.
Authority: Establish your credibility first and highlight relevant expertise.
Commitment & Consistency: First get people to say yes to a smaller request. Once committed to you, they are more likely to agree to a future, bigger request in order to be consistent.
Liking: Give compliments (genuine and personalized), pace/mimic to win favor.
Social Proof: Show other examples. Only 5% of people are initiators the remaining 95% are imitators. If they see that others are doing the same thing, they are more likely to comply.
Unity: Remind them of a shared identity with you. A shared location, ethnicity, hobbies, previous company/industry, or a favorite sports team.
The last one, Unity, comes from Cialdini’s more recent book, Pre-Suasion but I’ve included it here as it completes his list.
My full persuasion reading list can be found here:
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Keywords: #Influence #Persuasion #CareerDevelopment # LeadershipTips