Skip to content
Advertisements

Why Reasoning With People Is A Waste Of Time: What You Should Do Instead

Photo by Vera Arsic on Pexels.com

Why do people end up arguing with us when we try to convince them with reasoning and facts? It turns out that reasoning in humans evolved more for the sake of winning arguments than to guide us with decision making.

This book, The Enigma of Reason, discusses the Argumentative Theory on the evolution of reasoning. It is authored by two renowned cognitive anthropologists, Dan Sperber and Hugo Mercier [1].

This is significant research that we all should pay attention to because it helps us understand a well know human conundrum. Why do people become more resistant, the more we try to persuade them with our reasoning? Even in cases we are certain we are right?

According to these new findings, it happens because we are the ones triggering argumentation in them when we force them to consider our reasons. They can’t help it. It’s in all our DNA!

Cognitively, human decision making still relies on primitive brain processes. It does not involve reasoning, which evolved later to help us prevail in arguments. Sperber and Mercier further outline this in an important and highly-cited paper in the Journal of Behavioral and Brain Sciences [2].

So what does this mean for us and how should we best persuade people?

Firstly, don’t waste your time trying to influence or sell an idea to someone by directly reasoning with them. This will likely frame their cognition to argue with the proposal and resist you.

Instead, bring people to a more receptive emotional state prior to influencing them and then engage the primitive decision making in their brains.

I’ve already discussed the ways to get people more likely to agree with our requests in my previous articles. You may want to read them because these are the most effective ways to persuade people. They work because they engage an automatic response in people to say yes to you, requiring almost no reasoning.

1) Use Cialdini’s principles (shortcuts) of influence.

The Right Way To Get People Saying “Yes” To You More Often – 7 Shortcuts of Influence

2) Get people focused on concepts that are directionally aligned with your proposal (Pre-Suasion).

Get People To Feel Like Saying Yes To You Even Before Making A Request

3) Use pacing and leading.

The Surprising Way To Get People To Change: Pacing and Leading

With these techniques, people are usually unaware that they are being persuaded in the first place. Thus, they cannot resist what they don’t detect and it is now much easier to influence them.

Once aligned with you, they will use the reasoning you now provide to justify a decision you already had them make – to agree with you.

Our subconscious first makes the decision and our conscious mind looks for reasons to justify it. Since we are not aware of the subconscious workings, we think we’ve made a rational decision based on facts.

This is powerful stuff, folks. Use the advice ethically and wisely.

References

  1. The Enigma of Reason By Hugo Mercier and Dan Sperber, Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA 2017
  2. Mercier, H.; Sperber, D. “Why do Humans Reason? Arguments for an Argumentative Theory” Behavioral and Brian Sciences, 2011, 34, 57-111.

Thanks for reading! Please follow me if you liked this because you may find my other advice useful too.

You can also follow me on Twitter (@DrShaunAdvice) because many smart people follow me there and enjoy my tweets. My teaching is simple and effective. You will grow with it and your eyes will be opened to how easy it actually is to be influential in your life and at work.

I fund my expenses of hosting this site through micro-donations from my audience on Patreon. In my own little way I am hoping to teach people how to influence and improve the outcomes in their lives. Your contributions will keep me inspired to continue this work. Thanks!

Keywords: #Persuasion #Influence #DecisionMaking #CognitiveSciences

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: